Caffeine + Alcohol = MADNESS!

Powers that be are moving to ban beverages like "Four Loko" that combine the alcoholic content of wine with the caffeine content of coffee.  The problem, supposedly, is that the caffeine interferes with that well-known natural effect of alcohol on young adults:  sleepiness.  Worse, the beverages may be "explicitly designed to attract under-age drinkers," what with their "colorful packaging and flavors like watermelon, blue raspberry and lemon-lime."   Consider the case of one student at Ramapo College, who was hospitalized after "drinking three cans of Four Loko and several shots of tequila in just over an hour."  Presumably, were it not for the caffeine in those three cans of Four Loko, the helpless student would simply have fallen asleep before he had the chance to drink those "several shots of Tequila."  These beverages are a menace.